Are You Facing Retirement? or Have you recently retired and found the transition difficult? Does the thought of retirement fill you with excitement and anticipation? or Do you dread the thought of giving up your job?
Workaholism is no different to the other “….holisms” in that the problem can be very difficult for partners and families to deal with.
Do you feel your life's dream is fulfilled? What gives you the most satisfaction in your life? Is there anything, which would make it more complete?
I am always struck how often we hear about the same theme in several different contexts. I have been amazed at how often the theme of time has come up this week. Several clients have chosen to focus their session on their lack of time and the negative impact this has on their lives this month – no surprise there you might say. Ask most people about their lives and they will tell you that they never have enough time.
Most of us use the New Year as a time to take stock of our lives. The break over Christmas gives us a bit of breathing space between the turkey, mince pies and the round of jollity. Many of us make promises that we convince ourselves we’ll try to keep this time. Those more cynical simply recognize that we will fail, so make the resolution not to make a resolution.
Creating lasting change is something many of us find difficult. If it was so easy none of us would need to lose weight, or keep smoking despite wanting to give it up, or continue to have disastrous relationships, or work too hard, or continue to make New Year’s resolutions which they fail to keep.
How many of you feel as if you are banging your head against a brick wall when you try to tackle your partners excessive work habits? That what ever you say, it seems to make no positive difference, in fact it actually appears to make things worse?
You Partners of workaholics find yourselves in a very difficult place. For much of the time you are expected to manage on your own whilst your partners are busy with work. As a childless partner it leaves you with great tracts of time waiting for your partner to be available to talk to or to do things with. Having them physically present is no actual indicator of your partner being available to you.
When you think about who you really are- do you love yourself? Do you like the person you are or do you feel that you are in some way wanting?
Whether you are working with your partner, your teen age children or a work colleague the principle is the same. What you say and the way in which it is said, the tone of voice, the words you use and the timing of when things are said all have the capacity to widen the gap between you and the other person to let them off the hook as they can rationalize your nagging as unreasonable, or to make them think.